We’ve already got a big fat bonerang for Michael Mahalchick, creator of our Official Art F City Judy Chicago Wiener. So imagine our joy when we heard that we’ll get to see even more of him today at NADA! This morning, we received a dispatch from our Editor Paddy Johnson, with cryptic but very tantalizing soundbytes related to some sort of stripper-themed performance that’s going down at 4:30pm, for one hour only.
- He’s going to be a “very exotic dancer”.
- He’s wearing 6-inch lucite heels and a bikini.
- There will be a champagne room. Cost: $100.
- “It’s like a strip club but it’s an art fair, so it’s more expensive.” According to Mahalchick, run-of-the-mill lap dance only costs about $25.
- “You should charge them $80 to keep your shirt on,” friend says.
- “You gotta upsell,” says friend.
- For $500, Mahalchick will visit your mom and say nice things about you. The travel and expenses are on you.
- He wondered, what is the most contemporary dance? “It’s either hiphop or exotic.” He chose exotic.
- How did Mahalchick learn to become a “very exotic dancer”? “Youtube is great for giving tips for dancing.”
- Why is he doing this? “If Marina Abramovic can stare at people for eight hours and pee into a little hole then I figure I can stand on some heels for an hour.”
No extras. The rest is up to your imagination.